After a botched attempt at switching to a more minimalistic theme, I finally found one that works and looks great. The theme is 281 and it is really nice and fast -- the authors of the theme promise a "WordPress theme that combined slick minimalist aesthetics, speed and search engine optimization." All I really care about is that it looks great as a (mostly) text-only theme and was easy to customize (orange, orange, orange everywhere!) Some of the cool new features that I got to add: